You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Randomize
