mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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