If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize