There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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