that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
