Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
