you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize