eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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