I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
from now on my penis is your penis
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
and i looked up. we had an audience...
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Randomize
