Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Can't talk, ducks in the car
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
