youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
