Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize