Midget sex pt 2 tonight
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize