I hate all girls vehemently.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
