Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
