very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
