OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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