I wannas sexs uuuuu
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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