How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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