Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
