Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize