i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize