Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
