I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
