I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
