She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
