:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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