awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
