i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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