kristin has been a bad kristin
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize