Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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