apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize