friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
