....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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