Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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