im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
