I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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