but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Randomize
