Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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