But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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