"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I touched a dick in church today
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
