remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
