WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
