i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
