You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
