i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
