if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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