'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
