Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
