I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
